so this is christmas, well I hope you had fun.

It's almost Christmas.

I'm alone in a flooded apartment. The fire department and the cops were all here.

I spent the last two hours running around with buckets and mops and towels.. In the dark. Then I did all my roommates dishes they left me with.

The only people that call me are my religious zealot relatives (the woman told my voicemail was tasteless, I didn't even give her my number) and drunk ex-boyfriends (don't do that anymore), and sometimes drunken religious jealous ex relatives who wish they were my boyfriend


If only I had a shelf to line up this circus freak sideshow of discarded narcissists that I have accumulated over the years.

And then I found something lovely in someone.

It was like space. Open. Terrifying. Magical. Unknowable.The universe expanding had me apart at the seams, and.. It wasn't enough.

I ran it into the ground, because, as an act of pure defense I became the worst narcissist of all.

And so we hang like ellipses in the air.

Waiting for ... ( )


And what's wrong with ambiguity?


One: Or inner. But what I have been meaning to say is that. Well, it's like. Today I pretended to be you, and I looked at the city skyline and thought..
Two: Oh that's the immensity! Of…
One: Yes! But I still don't know the secret of how to make love stay.


and so, we progress. or cough, or stutter. On, oh. And, oh. And, oh.

Christ was a stupid idea.

And also, everyone's Merry Christmas' Greetings, and Gifts, and Music, and Phone Calls

is abrasive.

Just because I'm not a Jew, doesn't mean I want to take part in this.
Shouldn't people ask before thrusting their unwanted Holiday wishes at me?
I'm not going to have a Happy Holiday, because you suggested it. In fact if I wasn't planning on having one all it does is rub it in my face.

That's why I like the Jews, They always ask, “Are you a Jew?” Before inviting me to light their menorah.

I read an article on, “15 reasons to Love NY”
and honestly, the fact that someone gave birth to a baby on the F train, is not going to get me through the winter.

Ways to cure misanthropy. (because it's fucking boring.)

1. haircut. 2. leopard print coat. 3. puddin' 4. clean room 5. poodle. 6. warmth. 7.vacation 8. suspended disbelief in anything. 9. waking up next to a mime. 10. my life is a joke. (why is my punchline in New Jersey!)